It's not that I don't want to tell you. It's just...
[ Hard to find words, mostly. Everything he comes up with always feels like it falls short of what he really means. The tether is helpful, in that sense, but at the same time, letting it come through there feels...like too much. More of him than anyone else should have to put up with. ]
I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to call on them again and not think about it.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ Given that it was one of the things used against Tsumiki. ]
I feel...I don't know. Complicit.
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[ Said with mostly gratitude, but a mild dose of exasperation, as well. ]
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[ Even if the tether does lay some of it bare. And the knowledge from the dream before that, imperfect conduits for the multitudes of a heart. ]
So you'll have to keep telling me, if you want me to know.
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[ Hard to find words, mostly. Everything he comes up with always feels like it falls short of what he really means. The tether is helpful, in that sense, but at the same time, letting it come through there feels...like too much. More of him than anyone else should have to put up with. ]
I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to call on them again and not think about it.
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[ Because that's what these connections are: convenient. When the words just don't come out right. ]
What will your alternative be here, if you don't call on them?
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It feels like a failure, too. Just...not the same one.
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The only thing he can do. ]
I will.
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You're shattering his worldview, Subaru. ]
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Within the confines of their tether, not yet fully delineated, Subaru also understands that he may be imposing what it is he feels on him.
But he doesn't rethink it — in their situation, they can't afford to. ]